SPOILER ALERT: While this review doesn't give a summary of the film, it does discuss key events. Or events that may have been intended as key events. If you plan to see the film, (which would be an error on your part) do that first, then read My Wisdom here and gnash your teeth in lamentation of not heeding the warnings of Uncle Steve.
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I need to confess right off that I'm not a fan of the 2009 reboot of Star Trek. I love the original universe; Star Trek occupied far too much of my time as a young man. Good memories. The reboot bothered me a lot, though. I thought--and still think--it wouldn't have been a half bad movie if all the characters and the universe they were in were director J.J Abrams' original creations, and not those lifted from a franchise he admits he never liked.
One of the problems I had with the first film in the reboot was the apparent erasing and resetting of the Trek universe I spent most of my 50+ years watching and loving. The character of Ambassador Spock--Leonard Nimoy, reprising his famous role as Captain Kirk's former First Officer--fell into a tear in space after failing to stop the destruction of the Romulan homeworld. A Romulan named Nero (??), blaming him for the catastrophe, followed him, and apparently changed history. So everything I knew was gone. Since then, the producers and Paramount have been ambiguous over whether or not this was a true reset, or if Spock and Nero simply crossed over into one of the many alternate universes seen over the decades of Trek TV episodes and films.
I decided to go with the latter theory--after all, games, comics and books since the first film insist the original universe is still intact--as it made this new version more acceptable. With that in mind, I felt the second film in Alternate Universe might be pretty good.
I was wrong.
Right off the bat, we learn the Enterprise in this universe...is also, apparently, a submarine. Seriously. I tried to remind myself this was another universe, but whatever universe you're in, this stretches credibility razor thin.
To rescue (new) Spock from certain death, (new) Kirk violates the Prime Directive, a highly revered law that prohibits Starfleet from interfering with a society's natural development (in the course of saving Spock, Kirk had to reveal the existence of the Enterprise to a race that was barely past caveman status). Fine, Shatner's Kirk violated the Prime Directive almost every other episode just for fun. Chris Pine's Kirk, though, got demoted. Also fine, that's realistic and unexpected. What wasn't unexpected was the highly unprofessional way Kirk and Spock argued in front of Admiral Pike. The conversation was funny, to be fair--and I did laugh. But in front of Pike?
More fun like this happened later in the film, with Lieutenant Uhura and Mr. Spock (who are in a relationship) arguing over his lack of expressing feelings for her. Kirk, to our amusement, gets in the middle of this. Problem is, they are all in the middle of a very dangerous situation involving Klingons which requires their strict attention. They're supposed to be professionals. They were acting like teenagers.
After a terrorist attack at a Starfleet facility housing records, an emergency meeting of top brass, Captains and their first officers is held. The terrorist is identified as a rouge intelligence agent named John Harrison (who we later learn is Khan). Kirk realizes the attack is really a decoy, since protocol would require senior Starfleet personnel to respond doing what they were doing--meeting then and there, in that room, which was then attacked.
Not bad, except Starfleet would have altered any protocol of that level once an intelligence agent went bad. At least, you would expect them to.
In "Star Trek II-The Wrath of Khan" we see Khan listening in on communicator messages between Kirk on the planet surface and Spock on the Enterprise, followed by evidence they were speaking in code to throw Khan off guard. Lieutenant Saavik later comments on a Starfleet rule they obviously followed about talking strategy in such situations.
In this film, however, Kirk and Scotty are talking strategy via communicators with no worries about being monitored....even though Scotty is on another Federation ship which is hostile.
Speaking of that other ship, she's commanded by Admiral Marcus, yet another Starfleet big shot gone bad. Fine, virtually all Treks in the Original Universe had them too. But Marcus' whole ship seems to have turned as well. Is respect to the oath that much of a joke in Starfleet?
At times, it seemed plots were just dropped. As noted earlier, Captain Kirk was demoted to Commander/First Officer early in the film. Spock was transferred off the Enterprise, and Pike was reinstated as Captain of the ship. Almost immediately, though, Pike is killed. Kirk gets the captaincy of the Enterprise back, and has Spock reinstated as his First Officer. An interesting plot resolved in about twenty minutes. Operation: Fail!
The subplot of the aforementioned Spock/Uhura romance really didn't go anywhere either. I got the impression J.J Abrams wanted to yell "Look! A white guy kissing a black girl! And...and...an ALIEN kissing a HUMAN girl! We're progressive! Woo!" Now, I could be wrong about this, but since we didn't get any actual drama here, Abrams just had it sit there, one wonders.
This second film in the reboot seemed to be wondering as it went along if it should be a remake of the second film in the original Trek Universe. Khan had information that made Kirk mistrust Admiral Marcus. Could Kirk trust Khan? I figured what was what before Kirk did. Not because I saw the real "Wrath of Khan" about four million times, but because Kirk was pretty dense throughout the film. In fact, Kirk questioned himself a lot in this film. That might have made an interesting plot for the first film, but by this point, he should have more confidence in himself.
Benedict Cumberbatch, to be fair, was given a thankless task. Had his character not been Khan, but, say, another tyrant (or Joachim, the name of a follower of Khan's in the original episode "Space Seed' and of another follower in the Wrath of Khan film) his role would have been outstanding. He gave a masterful performance. But all I could think was "You're not Khan. (Ricardo) Montalban is Khan. You're not Khan." Not his fault. J.J's fault (or Bush's fault, if you ask Barack Obama).
The whole remake idea of "Wrath of Khan" might have worked, if they stuck to the premise that Khan (or Joachim, if they used that character instead) had been mistreated by Admiral Marcus, and ended with Khan heroically sacrificing himself to save Kirk (or, for true poetic justice, save Spock--who of course died because of Khan back in the original second film). But, instead, Khan had to be a villain in the end (Admiral Marcus would have been enough--Peter Weller is that good).
But instead, we had an incredibly stupid scene of Kirk sacrificing himself the same way Spock did back in "Wrath", complete with Scotty, substituting for McCoy in calling Kir...um, Spock down from the bridge to say goodbye to the dying hero. To add true insult to injury, we had the insulting, aggravating scene of Spock responding to Kirk's passing by yelling "KHAAAAANNNN!!!"...just like Kirk did in "Wrath of Khan" when Khan told him he was just going to leave Kirk in the middle of a dead planet. J.J, this wasn't Saturday Night Live. This was supposed to be an actual Star Trek film.
Kirk's death wasn't the drama it was obviously supposed to be. One problem with a film in a franchise is that we know ahead of time--whether we want to or not--if a main character dies. We knew months before 'The Dark Knight Rises" the film would end with Batman faking his death so he, as Bruce Wayne, could get on with his life. I wasn't sure how Kirk would come back, but I knew he would (and unlike Spock in "Wrath", he would come back by film's end).
There were more depressing moments. When Scotty was in the bar, in leisure clothes and got a communicator call from Kirk (I guess Starfleet communicators don't work just for Starfleet calls) actor Simon Pegg seemed to be doing a very good Don Knotts imitation. I half expected him to call Kirk "Andy" by mistake. The Klingons? Yes, they looked tough and menacing. So do a lot of real life street gangs. Every incarnation of Klingons before this looked more than menacing. These guys were a disappointment. Not really fond of the new Klingon ship design either.
Finally, Leonard Nimoy's cameo as "classic" Spock was just heartbreaking. First, he just doesn't look well at all. I'm hoping it's makeup, with the idea Spock has really been through the wringer with all that happened in the last film--I don't recall Nimoy looking like that in the last picture I saw of him, which i don't think was all that long ago. But he is in his eighty's.
Second, his (Spock's) comments reinforce the idea this universe is not one existing side by side (more or less) with "my" Trek Universe, but rather the same universe, which he accidentally changed last time. Just sad.
And third, Spock notes he swore not to reveal anything to his younger self, as Spock the Younger needed to find his own answers. And then reveals everything to his younger self. Worthy of a Mel Brooks film. Not worthy of a real Star Trek film.
The film did have some good points, though. Using Carol as a plot device against her father (as opposed to making her a love interest for Kirk--again) was one. McCoy and Carol's working on the torpedo was another, and a nice homage to the scene in "Star Trek 6-The Undiscovered Country" in which McCoy helped Spock recalibrate a torpedo to hit a cloaked Klingon ship. Mentioning the Gorn and Christine Chapel was nice too. I loved hearing the original series theme for the end credits music. And, of course, the special effects were phenomenal. That alone is worth seeing on a large screen LED TV, on BD.
Sadly...that's pretty much the only reason to watch it at home. Granted, the bar set by the second film in the first Trek legacy is pretty damn high. But the second film in this second 'legacy' can't even see that bar.
'Star Trek-Into Darkness' is playing at a theater near you, and is rated PG. You have been warned.
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